Write a reply to each of the following posts:
Post 1:
- Of the three types of face needs—fellowship face, competence face, autonomy face—which is the most important to you? Under what circumstances do the others become more important?
As a relatively newer nurse with about 2 years of practice under my belt, I value competence face needs the most at this time. My workflow is largely dependent upon the cooperation of the patients who are in my care; as Floyd accurately describes, “If others accept the image you portray, they’ll tend to behave in ways that encourage that image” (Floyd, 2021). Patients have a keen knack for detecting lack of confidence in a practitioner’s skills; as such, they may be more likely to refuse treatments and express verbally and physically abusive behaviors. Conversely, I have noticed that patients are more likely to value my care and professional judgment if I portray a public image of calmness and control--even if I am falling apart on the inside! My ability to render care to my patients smoothly and accurately has become highly influential upon my self-esteem. My need for autonomy face becomes more urgent when I perceive that I am being micro-managed by my nurse manager, which occurs by way of language such as, “Why didn’t you___?” or, “You were supposed to ____.” In my opinion, this erodes my autonomy as a licensed professional and demotes me to the level of a novice student. Fellowship face took precedence while I was completing my studies in nursing programs; due to the rigorous curriculum, I sought the support of my peers to help me cope with the emotional stress. This face need is particularly difficult to achieve in an online program, as I am not able to perceive the same sense of camaraderie when I am not in the physical presence of others.
2. Can you think of a situation when you have been the recipient of inappropriate self-disclosures? How did you feel in that situation? In what ways were the self-disclosures
I am regularly the recipient of inappropriate self-disclosures due to my work with the general public on a medical/surgical unit. To be fair, there is an implicit rule between patient and practitioner that information exchange is expected, necessary, and most importantly, confidential. The nature of this relationship tends to bypass the usual pace of the social penetration theory, resulting in a rapid progression of private details being shared without the expectation of reciprocity. Medical self-disclosure is certainly understandable in the context of diagnosis and treatment, but psychosocial disclosure can create an uncomfortable atmosphere that may lead to overstepped boundaries. I am sure that my social work/therapist colleagues experience this phenomenon even more frequently. I find it challenging to express my discomfort when patients reveal intimate details about their personal lives/innermost thoughts and feelings; for instance, I recently cared for a patient who proudly lifted her shirt to show me her latest breast augmentation surgery and told me that she “bashed the face in of the stupid b--- who botched my eyebrow tattoos!” Fearing disciplinary action, I did not discourage the patient’s behavior, instead choosing to ignore her statements. It is highly likely that the patient has an underlying personality disorder, which is best mitigated with direct and clear communication of boundaries; i.e., “I don’t feel comfortable when you speak that way to me. Let’s focus on how I can help you with your medical treatment.”
3. What are some situations that threaten our need for inclusion? Our need for affection? Our need for control? How do you generally react in those situations?
Need for inclusion may be threatened when one is surrounded by others who are not part of his or her own peer group. For example, as an older student, I am often in classes with students who are 10 years younger than myself. As a result, I often refrain from forming friendships with classmates, instead assuming the role of mentor and offering help with studying and project collaboration. As an adoptee at birth, my need for affection has been threatened for my entire life, a known and well-researched psychological phenomenon amongst adopted children. Additionally, my adoptive father was a severe alcoholic. As a result, I did not develop healthy attachment and became quite introverted with few lasting friendships. In my early adolescence, I sought to fulfill my need for affection by engaging in romantic relationships with similarly dysfunctional dynamics as my adoptive family. Our need for control can be threatened during times of unplanned emergency, which can provoke emotional distress. Recently, my car window was shattered by a stray rock that was launched by a landscaper’s weed whacker. I remember the sense of dread that washed over me as I sat in the car, panicking about how I would be able to legally drive my car with a shattered window when all car service centers were already closed for the evening. Perceived loss of control can lead to momentary paralysis of thought, limiting my ability to problem-solve on the spot.
Post 2:
Of the three types of face needs—fellowship face, competence face, autonomy face—which is the most important to you? Under what circumstances do the others become more important?
I believe all three face needs are very important, but the most important face needs to me is competence face with many different reasons.People that are known to be competent are more respected and valued.More people want to like and get to know someone who is driven to a successful career.They often won’t second guess your judgement either.It isn’t enough to just be liked by others or to remain in control of making decisions for yourself.It would be an asset to your character if you embody all three face needs in circumstances such as starting a new job and easily having the ability to be liked by peers and the ability to stand up for ourselves when being taken advantage of by a coworker or boss who continuous for you to do their job for them.
Can you think of a situation when you have been the recipient of inappropriate self-disclosures? How did you feel in that situation? In what ways were the self-disclosures
I have often times been on the receiving end of inappropriate self-disclosure.I worked over a decade in product development with Disney and there were multiple times when senior vice presidents of the department would overshare personal information during meetings.We did work very closely for many years, but certain personal information is always better left unsaid.I always left the meetings feeling embarrassed for her and myself.It was continuously evident that her level of comfortless and friendship were not the same as mine.
What are some situations that threaten our need for inclusion? Our need for affection? Our need for control? How do you generally react in those situations?
In peer groups when you are excluded from the group without reasoning, a child will focus more on why they have been excluded instead of why they have a need to been included.It could very well just be an age matter.Our need for affection can easily intensify if we lost a loved one recently from a break up or a possible death.I personally am the type of person who doesn’t mind being excluded from a group or once in a while having to take a backseat to someone else while they take control of a situation.The only situation that I would mostly have an array of reactions, sadness, fear, and anger is if affection from a loved one would be threatened.
Post 3:
Some people use the terms hearing and listening interchangeably, but they aren’t the same activity. Hearing is merely the perception of sound. Just because we’re hearing something doesn’t mean we’re listening to it. Unlike hearing, listening is an active process of paying attention to a sound, assigning meaning to it, and responding to it (Floyd, 2020, p.225).
These days, many people go online, whether it’s to communicate with existing friends and loved ones or to make new connections with people who understand what they’re going through. In either case, it’s possible to find good listeners in online venues (Floyd, 2020, p. 233).
Engaging in pseudolistening and selective attention occurs for many reasons. Maybe you’re bored with what the speaker is saying, but you don’t want to seem rude. Maybe you don’t understand what you’re hearing, but you’re too embarrassed to admit it. Maybe you’re paying attention to something else while someone is talking to you, or maybe you simply don’t like what the other person is saying. Whatever the reason, pseudolistening (Floyd, 2020, p.237). You can change this behavior by eliminating any noise while the speaker is talking.
I recently fell victim to confirmation bias, this isn’t a regular occurrence for me. It had to do with one of my children and another mother. I quickly realized that the women weren’t going to listen to my side of the story, so I simply ended the conversation with the fact that we did agree on one thing and that our children need space.
Post 4:
Passion is a secondary emotion consisting of joy and surprise, plus experiences of excitement and attraction for another (Floyd, 2020, p.252). We can feel passion, for our pets, cars, hobbies, and anything that may give us genuine happiness. Before going back to school, I was passionate about running. That passion lead me to run the NYC marathon.
Contempt leads you to feel that you’re better than someone else. It is one of the most harmful emotions for personal relationships. People express contempt by insulting or mocking others, putting others down, belittling or making fun of others, and signaling that others are stupid or incompetent. Studies by psychologist John Gottman have found that expressions of contempt from one romantic partner often lead the other to withdraw and become distant—a reaction that can leave conflicts unresolved and put the couple at increased risk of breaking up (Floyd, 2020, pages. 224-225).
We can compensate for the limitations of channel-lean computer-mediated forms of communication by using emoji to convey facial expressions, such as a smiling face to represent happiness and a confused face to show when we’re puzzled. Sometimes we do so in abbreviated forms, such as by writing “j/k,” which stands for “just kidding,” to convey that we are joking or being sarcastic. In such ways, we compensate for the limitations of channel-lean forms of communication on the expression of emotion. (Floyd, 2020, p. 269). I personally feel that these methods are just as effective in conveying emotion to the person with whom we are communicating.
I personally don’t use social media as a main source of communicating or in general. I have used it to express major milestones or special events in my life. I have expressed happiness due to a birth or sadness due to a death. I see this as a benefit to social media, being able to reach a large group of friends and family at one time. I believe you have to be careful and accept that there might be criticism and judgment, negative feedback due to other people’s attitudes or views.