Please note the RTN on your record. This means that I am returning your paper ungraded because if I were to grade it as submitted it would fail.
You have a lot of interesting information and insight to this topic; however, so far you have given more of an opinion essay on the topic. Please remember, this is a formal research paper, where you need to state claims, then provide scientific research to support your viewpoint (along with citing the sources of the information within your paper). Additionally, the premise of this paper is on Bandura and his theory & Bobo Doll experiment, which you did not mention at all in your paper.
Please read through my comments and suggestions as well as the original instructions that came with your exam to revise your paper appropriately. Also be sure to state that others do not agree with your viewpoint, but then provide additional research to show how they are wrong in their thinking.
Once you have chosen your topic you need to organize your thoughts into manageable sections:
I. Introduction
A. Topic
1. Clearly state your topic for the reader. The topic I have chosen to discuss is the role that media violence plays in aggression in children specifically as related to Bandura’s experiments.
2. Depending on the topic you chose, you may find it helpful to provide a brief definition of the main concept behind it. Give a very brief description of Bandura’s experiment.
3. Now is the time you should voice your opinion on this topic – this is your thesis. Do you agree with the major tenets of the theories behind its concepts? If not, what do you disagree with? Is media fully to blame for all the violence in the world or is there some other force accountable? If you believe that is that is fine just make three claims related to this. If you are not sure, think about this - if the media is as much to blame as Bandura would like us to believe wouldn’t every child end up being an axe murderer?
Organize the body of your paper in the following fashion:
II. First claim related to your main thesis (remember you are eventually going to have at least 3 claims) The media is certainly has a presence in our lives and that of our children and no one would be foolish to claim that many television shows, movies, and video games are graphically violent. However, if as Bandura claims children are so impressionable wouldn’t more children be stabbing each other on the playground because they have become so desensitized to violence? OR As more and more children become desensitized to violence and killing, it is no wonder that violence on the playground and school bus has increased. . OR Media does have some effect on the level of violence but it should not be used as an excuse for a flawed personality or someone who has not learned the rules of society as there are many other factors that can lead to violence in a child/adolescent/adult.
A. Statement explaining or adding to the claim
B. Researched support for the statement
1. For this you need to provide at least one (1) direct quotation from one of the articles you have read for this project)
III. Objections (remember you have to going to have at least 3 of these as well)
A. You must acknowledge that not everyone will agree with what you are saying
B. Refutation.
1. For this you must supply additional research in the form of a quotation that supports your original claim and indicates to those who do not agree with you why they are incorrect in their thinking
You will follow this pattern for the next several paragraphs (making a minimum of three to four claims related to your main topic, providing research that will support that point, acknowledging that not everyone will agree with your claim, and then providing additional research that will indicate why those who believe that way are incorrect).
V. Conclusion
A. Restatement of topic
B. Restatement of main ideas
Please Note: This outline is only intended to help you organize your thoughts. You must submit an essay.
Cite Your Sources
You must use at least two (2) of the following sources: your textbook, Psychology and Your Life (required) and the assigned Internet source as noted in the study guide. In addition, you may use one additional reliable source (either a text or Internet article). To avoid plagiarism, you should know how to use these sources properly—by summarizing, paraphrasing, and using direct quotes for the material you use in your paper.
• To summarize material, rewrite it in your own words without looking at the original. Simply rely on your own memory of what you read.
• To paraphrase, rewrite the original but use some words from the source and refer to the original while rewriting.
• For direct quotes, use the author’s words exactly, enclosing them in quotation marks. No matter which method you use, you must give credit to the original source. The standard for research papers in the social sciences is American Psychological Association (APA) formatting. Use in-text citations in the following format to give credit to the original source: “As Whitmeyer (2000) stated, “Power is . . .” (p. 536).
On your Works Consulted page, use the following format to reference your sources:
Whitmeyer, J. M. (2000). Power through appointment [Electronic version].
Social Science Research, 29, 535–555.
For more information on APA formatting, visit these Web sites:
• n Overview and workshop: http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/664/01/
• APA formatting and style guide: http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/printable/560/01/
• Documenting electronic sources: http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/560/10/
• Examples of in-text citations and reference pages:
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/560/03/
Proofread and Edit Your Paper
Once you’ve written your paper, begin the process of proofreading and editing your work.
• Let your computer help you as much as possible. Run both a spell check and a grammar and style check. Use the Help feature on your word-processing program to determine how to turn on these functions.
• Make sure your paper has no spelling, punctuation, or grammar errors. Don’t ignore the red, green, and blue squiggles under your text! It’s your computer’s way of telling you that there’s a problem; listen to it.
Format Your Paper
To format your project, use a standard font such as Times New Roman, 12 point. Set margins at the standard one (1) inch on all sides. If necessary, use the Help feature on your word-processing program to learn how to set up the font and margins and how to create the required header. In the header, provide the following information in the format shown below:
Provide a cover sheet with the following information:
• The title in ALL CAPITAL LETTERS
• Your name and Student Number
• The following information:
Submitted for course number SSC130BB
Essentials of Psychology
Current date (for example, July 25, 2009)
• Research project number 050220500
• Follow the instructions for submitting your work.
Submitting Your Assignment
Follow this procedure to submit your assignment:
1. On your computer, save a revised and corrected version of your project.
2. Go to http://www.pennfoster.edu and log on as a student.
3. Go to My Courses.
4. Click on Take Exam next to the lesson you’re working on.
5. Enter your e-mail address in the box provided. (Note: This information is required for online submission.)
6. Attach your file or files as follows:
a. Click on the Browse box.
b. Locate the file you wish to attach.
c. Double-click on the file.
d. Click on Upload File.
7. Click on Submit Files.
REVEAL VIEW FROM THE UNCONSCIOUS OF MEDIA VIOLENCE
Name; Student Number:
Submitted for course SSC 130 Essentials of Psychology
October 20, 2012
Project Number: 05020500
(Remember to have a separate title page)
Introduction
I believe, the primary purpose of the Media is to serve human beings by rendering to them true facts, but currently Media Violence is adversely affecting the young generation.
In reality, prohibiting Media Violence has now almost become impossible for anyone. Possessed by the demon of profit making the world of media is gradually running towards its doom. To survive in the dilemmatic economic conditions media has incorporated violence, sex, and other modes of attraction to earn money. But what is pathetic is that, this sort of efforts on the part of the media has been thoroughly supported by a considerable number of audiences. Now I would like to convey a statement extracted from the text book which states that, according to Feldman (2010), “Psychologists have sought to understand how aggression begins in childhood and how it may be prevented” (text book P (page 19). And it is this effort on the part of psychologists which has actually aggravated the quest for learning about the role of media in indulging in the growth of aggressive behavior among children.
Among the topics mentioned above, I would like to state the reason of choosing the subject of media violence, and the reason is that I was born in Japan and my mother loved Hollywood movies, and my life itself had been greatly influenced by the American media.
My mother was influenced by the romantic movies of the 1960’s movie and specifically by the movies of Audrey Hepburn, James Dean. She liked the movie Gone with Wind, and the music of the Beatles. Her favorite genre was always the nonviolent one but unfortunately the essence of nonviolence gradually is withering away from the realm of Hollywood motion picture and from the realm of American media industry.
And being concerned with such void I would like to address three causes that actually created media Violence in opposition to the process of creating value in the process of media influence.
You have stated the topic and your reason for choosing it; however, you also need to address the topic as it relates to Albert Bandura and his theory. Please refer to the instructions for the introduction again to make these changes.
Aggressive aspect of media affecting the human consciousness
First evidence of the media violence that ultimately created atrocious killers is to be found in the movie Child Play 3 (1993).
Child Play 3 (1993) was Budgeted $13 Million USD, and it made gross profit of 150% through its worldwide business.
The plot stated: “Chucky, the doll possessed by a serial killer, returns for revenge against Andy, the young boy that defeated him and has since become adult.”
This movie was thoroughly based on aggressive violence and Robert Thompson and Jon Venables who at age of 10 watched the movie sitting at their home in England, decided to revitalize the same scenario into their life and become the central protagonist of the story. They went to a shopping center and abducted an innocent and beautiful toddler named James Bulger who was only 2 years old. Robert and Jon punched, kicked, the poor child and put battery into his mouth, choked his neck and colored his face with blue paint, then left the little boy on rail road. Here, you are giving a news story and movie plot to support your viewpoint, but please remember, the purpose of this paper is to state a claim, then give research to show support for what you are saying. Additionally, what is the source for this information you are giving? And how would this maybe relate to Bandura’s experiment with children?
It was a really atrocious incidence, but most of media report didn’t focus this incident seriously and neither did consider it a serious example of the ill-effects of media violence. Moreover, this sort of incident didn’t only happen in England but it did take place in some parts of the U.S. too and this was because the movie was a Hollywood production and the Hollywood motion picture association never took serious steps to prevent the depiction of brutality in movies. It was necessary to take prompt action to prevent the recurrence of the brutal history of child murder, and set out further restrictions or new regulations to avoid media violence. Also in my opinion, the media should have reported this kind of incidents seriously mentioning that such incidents are outcome of the violence that is depicted in the different genres of entertainment media and other forms of media. It should have been reported that it was the depiction of aggressive violence in media that affected the unconscious ego of Robert and John, the two criminals that killed an innocent toddler. What is the source for this information? What is your claim? How does this all tie to Bandura’s theory & experiment?
Sigmund Freud (1923) stated: "Ego is attempts to mediate between id and reality, it is often obliged to cloak the unconscious commands of the id with its own preconscious rationalizations to conceal the id's conflicts with reality, to profess ... to be taking notice of reality even when the id has remained rigid and unyielding." Although you are mentioning a theory by another scientist / physician, please remember the premise of this paper is actually based on Albert Bandura’s theory and experiments. You can use other theories further in your paper as research to support your claims, but so far, you have not mentioned Bandura. And not sure how Freud’s theory here helps with the topic of this paper? You gave a quote about Freud’s theory, but how does that specifically tie to watching violent media may or may not cause more violent behaviors?
Therefore, we should realize that first of all, this incidence created not only created a criminal out of immature individuals but is also related to aggressive media violence and hence, we should be more aggressive in checking the rise of media violence and should try to find out how media violence affects the criminal’s unconsciousness layers of mind. And this information is necessary to formulate ways in preventing such effects.
The next serious crime occurred on May 1997 in Japan.
The crime took place in front of an Elementary school gate. One morning, someone put beheaded head in front of a school gate. Also a note was left on the mouth of beheaded head that stated:
“This is the beginning of the game... You police guys stop me if you can... I desperately want to see people die, it is a thrill for me to commit murder. A bloody judgment is needed for my years of great bitterness." Again, you are giving a news story. What is your claim here? What is your source for this information? How does this tie to Bandura?
The beheaded head was of an 11 years old boy who was missing for three days from his elementary school. The criminal was a 14 years old boy named Sakakibara. He assassinated other targets on February 10, 1997. Sakakibara came prepared with a hammer and a knife, and hit on two female elementary school students’ head on the road while they were returning back from school. March 16, 2007, Sakakibara, following an elementary school girl, hit her on the head by his hammer, and 5 minutes later, Sakakibara found another elementary school girl and stabbed in her stomach by his knife. May 24, 2007, Sakakibara found a new target that looked like a disable elementary school student. His name was Hase and he was 11 years old. Sakakibara asked Hase to go together on the mountain, and when they arrived at the mountain, Sakakibara chocked Hase’s neck with his best effort until he die, but Hase didn’t die so quickly, so Sakakibara hit hase’s head with brick until he died. After Sakakibara was confirmed about Hase’s death, he kicked, punched, took out Hase’s eyeball and beheaded him with handsaw. Again, you are giving examples from news stories, not scientific research or other experiments done that would support claims and statements you are making.
After central police in Japan captured Sakakibara, the world media reported “Sakakibara as Serial Killer’”. But the true fact was that, Sakakibara was deeply addicted with horror movies and this truth had been confirmed by the horror movie DVDs which were found under his bed.
Therefore, I assume that media violence caused this crime it is not clear how media aggressive violence affected Sakakibara’s unconsciousness layer. Because I assume that a criminal already existed in Sakakibara’s unconsciousness level of mind. Further, an individual’s unconscious spirit inevitably transfers eternally into an individual’s deep consciousness.
Curl Jung (1944), had an incredible experience when he suffered from a myocardial infarction, stated “It seemed to me that I was high up in space.” (p. 289)
Jung experienced near death, and confirmed that there is life after death. If there is life after death, then there should be a life before birth and this is because life is eternal. Therefore, criminal mind pre-existed in Sakakibara’s unconscious layer from the time before his birth, but came to surface due to the influence of media violence.
Unfortunately, this paragraph is unrelated to the topic of how watching violent media may influence violent behavior. Not sure what Jung’s quote has to do with Bandura’s theory, and you are making an assumption as to what caused Sakakibara to act like this. Please find scientific research, or other experiments to prove that watching violent media may bring to the surface violent tendencies, if that is your viewpoint.
Now I would like to focus on Social media violence.
The ABC News (10/20/2012) special spotted a grave incident and reported it under the heading, "Hidden America: Don't Shoot I Want to Grow Up”. This report was about a gang that shot 24 people in Chicago last Saturday. The Chicago Police Department told ABC News that 16 of the 24 victims shot were affiliated with gangs. Among these Gang members, some are aspiring rappers who often use Facebook, Twitter, Hipstar, MySpace, Youtube and other social media outlets to spread inflammatory messages and instigate rival gangs to respond. Police officers have even found password-protected, gang-related websites that are used to recruit members and inform members about meetings or parties and even commit crimes, and this information is according to the Chicago Crime Commission. You have an interesting topic here… I would like to see how you can tie together Bandura’s theory, and state a claim showing how social media is being used to promote violent behavior, then also provide research to support your thoughts.
Moreover, in relation to the cases discussed, I would like to cite the view of Nine Consciousness of eastern Buddhist philosophy. There are nine consciousness layers in human consciousness. First consciousness to fifth consciousness layer encompasses the sense of sight, hearing and smell. Deeper in the sixth consciousness layer there occur an integration of processes related to the various sensory data. Below sixth consciousness, the seventh consciousness layer condense individual identity, national, gender, own attachment, and sense of right or wrong. Deeper than the seventh consciousness, there is the eighth consciousness layer. The eight consciousness layer is the karmic store layer. It would store internal cause and effect of the karma. The deepest consciousness is the ninth consciousness. The nine consciousness store fundamentally pure consciousness and operate life force and purifies the eighth consciousness. Therefore, aggressive media violence hit the thick shell of the eighth consciousness which may carry a gloomy criminal inclination. And in the concerned cases of violence stimuli of visual violence did splash out the surface of the consciousness layers, and took the atrocious action. In this view “Self Mater” of the Media Violence would be a key factor, because media violence aggressively stubbed criminal’s unconsciousness eighth layer, and it would be uncontrollable. Please reformat this section of your paper. Please remember this is a formal, research paper, based on scientific studies and research done in the field of Psychology on watching violent media and its effects. We appreciate your explanation and spiritual insight on the nine types of consciousness, but unfortunately, what you have written here is not necessary in the context of this type of paper.
In the world of technology of 21st century, criminals are easy to create through social media networks. And why this is so is because the world of virtual reality is actually widening the gaps between individuals who are becoming more inclined towards connecting through internet rather than meeting personally. And such distance is actually enticing the psychological deterioration on the part of different individuals who although interacting with friends and relatives over social network sites are actually lonely in reality. There is a certain irony in the fact, and people now are apathetic towards don’t need to understanding the feeling of suffering or pain of others.
Conclusion
In conclusion, my report on the three Media Violence cases was based on the view of unconscious theory of Sigmund Freud (1923), Carl Jung (1923) and view of Nine Consciousness of eastern Buddhist philosophy. The discussion actually strived to convey that following the Kantian theory media should try to influence the greater mass positively and it should benefit the majority and help individual attain a good way of life. Therefore, media should inspire the awakening of the good nature of human consciousness to establish positive bond between people and should try to eradicate the evil lurking deep in individual minds. Further, I would like to suggest that the issue of media violence should be addressed in the Universal Declaration of Human Right to bring it under the heading of a moral issue that may adversely affect the human ethics. Moreover, the Academy of Motion Picture Art and Science in United States should take initiation to collaborate with United Nation, and increase the category of humanitarian film award and this can be inspirational for young and experienced directors who will then tend to formulate more humanitarian films deviating from the path of excessive violence. (topic unrelated to the premise of this paper)
Overall, you tried to give the reader a lot of different types of information, from your own personal insight and beliefs, to giving examples from news stories; however, remember you are picking one topic, one side of the argument – does watching violent media influence its viewers to act out aggressively? If yes, then you agree with Bandura. You would want to focus on Bandura’s theory of observational learning, give claims and scientific studies that look at this. If you believe no, there are other factors than just watching violence that make someone that way, like environmental factors, abuse, genetic predisposition, then you would need to argue for that side of the topic, and give claims and research to support that argument.
References:
English Version Kant (1989) Critique of Practical Reason: Thomas Kingsmill Abbott
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Id,_ego_and_super-ego
http://www.awakenedlands.com/register.php?refid=2&ad=1&gclid=CIaK5YPmjbMCFe1xQgodHzYAqw
http://www.christianaction.org.za/newsletter_uca/uca-artic_mediaviolence.htm
http://www.crimezzz.net/serialkillers/K/KOBE_school_killer.htm
http://www.godfatherfivefamilies.com/ppc?entrypt=gf-gg---en@73--TGF_GameSpecific_US-gang_music-gang_music_Phrase-&kw=gang%20music
New York: Panthon Books (1961), Dreams Reflections: C.G. Jung, edited by Aniela Jaffe
World Tribune Press (2002) The wisdom of lotus sutra, volume IV: Daisaku Ikeda
Feldman, R. (2010) Psychology and your Life
Remember to list your authors within the context of your paper, tying them to the information they have contributed. Be sure to also use the required sources for this paper.